Thursday, June 26, 2008

Hear ye, Hear ye

I have a new water softener and I'm excited. Which is kind of sad now that I think about it. I still remember the days (thankfully pregnancy brain hasn't caused me to forget everything) when I was excited for new Barbies, Christmas presents, first dates, and gossip. Now all it takes for me to get worked up is my husband doing chores, new water softeners, and reruns of Law & Order. Oh, and not having to work tomorrow (but who wouldn't find that exciting.)

The hubby will be having a birthday this weekend, which I still think is exciting though he's insisting he doesn't want to celebrate. I don't understand this refusal to have fun on birthdays thing that's come up lately. I mean, think about the alternative. Sound more fun? Didn't think so. So suck it up and have a good time. In my opinion you're lucky to have one.

The only downer to this birthday-shmirthday jazz was the following conversation I had with the hubby (recorded below for your shock and appall).

Crappy Hubby: "You realize I'm still going to be in my twenties when you're in your thirties?"
Fantastically Irritated Me: "Yes. Thanks for the reminder."
Crappy Hubby: "And you're going to be in your fourties while I'm still in my thirties?"
Fantastically More Irritated Me: "Do you want to see this birthday that's coming up or are you looking to end it right here?"

No one likes to be reminded of their own mortality.

Tuesday, June 24, 2008


Let's get one thing straight. I don't believe that all problems can be solved with violence, nor do I believe it should be a solution even considered in the majority of situations. I do believe that education and appropriate consequences are the best and most effective solution in most situations. However, there are a few situations where I find a straight up punch in the face to be the most effective method for dealing with the offending parties.

1. Animal abuse (see this article)
2. Spousal or child abuse
3. If nothing else works

Seriously though. If you think abusing animals is fun, or you believe in doing it just because you can, you deserve to have everyone you meet punch you in the face until you realize what a j--k a-s you are. And if you don't realize it, well you'll still get what's coming to you.

Monday, June 23, 2008


What does a loving wife get for a husband who claims he wants nothing for his birthday (but Jack's Naturally rising crust pizza and corn)?

Life is beautiful

Not much to report on of late. I enjoyed a fantastic Friday lounging at the beach with my fellow bloghers JoJotheKnitster and Punk Rock HR, as well as my fantastic hubby, who insisted on driving the gas guzzler as the check engine light is once again on in the vdub. A minor irritation however I'll let it slide as long as it continues to get me where I need to go on 28 mpg.

After our beachisode we were desperately in need of snacks and beverages so we headed to the Idler to waste the rest of our day in nothing to do luxury with our much more motivated friends (who had just woken up from a nap after biking the 34 miles from Kalamazoo to South Haven). And I thought waddling my phat pregnant ass around all day was tough.

I just took a glance around and noticed laziness seems to have taken over my household this evening. (And shakiness apparently has overtaken my arm.)

Tuesday, June 17, 2008

Thursday, June 12, 2008

Let's play a game

First I totally admit this post is stolen from Notes from the Garden Spot of the World.

Next, let's play this game. I love to read - love it- and am always reading something. Last week it was The Bradley Method of Childbirth, over the weekend it was Eat Pray Love and Super Natural Cooking and this week it's Family Dinners.

The following list of books are the top 106 books tagged "unread" at LibraryThing . Let's see how well read we are.

Jonathan Strange & Mr Norrell
Anna Karenina
One Hundred Years of Solitude
Crime and Punishment
Wuthering Heights
The Silmarillion
Don Quixote
The Odyssey
The Brothers Karamazov
Madame Bovary
War and Peace
A Tale of Two Cities
Jane Eyre
The Name of the Rose
Moby Dick
The Iliad
Vanity Fair
Love in the Time of Cholera
The Blind Assassin
Pride and Prejudice
The Canterbury Tales
The Historian: A Novel
The Kite Runner
Great Expectations
Life of Pi
The Time Traveler's Wife
Guns, Germs, and Steel: The Fates of Human Societies
Atlas Shrugged
Foucault's Pendulum
The Grapes of Wrath
A Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius
Mrs. Dalloway
Sense and Sensibility
Reading Lolita in Tehran: A Memoir in Books
The Count of Monte Cristo
Memoirs of a Geisha
The Sound and the Fury
Brave New World
American Gods
The Poisonwood Bible
Wicked: The Life and Times of the Wicked Witch of the West
The Picture of Dorian Gray
A Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man
The Satanic Verses
Mansfield Park
Gulliver's Travels
The Three Musketeers
The Inferno
The Corrections
The Amazing Adventures of Kavalier and Clay
The Fountainhead
Tess of the D'Urbervilles
Oliver Twist
To the Lighthouse
A Clockwork Orange
Robinson Crusoe
The Scarlet Letter
One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest
The Once and Future King
Anansi Boys
The God of Small Things
A Short History of Nearly Everything
Oryx and Crake
Angela's Ashes
Collapse: How Societies Choose to Fail or Succeed
The Hunchback of Notre Dame
In Cold Blood
Lady Chatterley's Lover
A Confederacy of Dunces
Les Misérables
The Amber Spyglass
The Prince by Niccolo Machiavelli
Watership Down
The Aeneid
A Farewell to Arms
Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance
Treasure Island
David Copperfield
Sons and Lovers
The Book Thief
The history of Tom Jones
The Road
Tender is the Night
The War of the Worlds


It's been a loooonngg week. I'm not sure if its the pregnancy or my zeal for over scheduling and packing as much as possible into every day, but I'm feeling a little worn down and over tired. So far this week I've worked, cleaned, made cookies to celebrate a birthday, walked the dog, swam, volunteered, knitted, shopped, gardened, and tried to sleep - though the heat is kicking my ass. Miser that I am, over the weekend we ran the central air AND the window unit in our bedroom and I was still dreaming of a bathtub full of cold water. It's interesting how all winter I dreamed of laying out in the hot sun on the beach only to find myself this summer trying to find a walk-in cooler to crawl into.

I've also noticed this week that it seems like I'm having increasing trouble breathing - almost like I can't get enough air in. It's likely due to the baby taking up more and more space but this doesn't help to quell my already high anxiety level at all, but I just keep thinking about the 15 more weeks to go.

Thanks to the slightly less humid weather this week the garden is finally mostly in - I do need to stop and get some straw to mulch the onions and greens but other than that most of the hard labor is done. The tomatoes, zucchini, and cukes are quickly making twining the supports necessary, and the eggplant and brussel sprouts are creeping higher and higher. I'm hoping to get some pictures up this weekend when I get the mulch down.

On another pregnancy caused accident prone note, last weekend I endured an almost injury - while sleeping. I had just gotten back to bed after spending some time in front of the tv - I was having some problems sleeping so I had gotten up extremely early and gone down to watch some tv until I was able to snooze again - and I was looking forward to a few delicious hours of sleeping late with nothing to do. The hubby and the critters were of course still snoozing away as I snuggled into my (tiny) spot. I had no sooner started to drift off when the hubby started to snore - loud. Frustrated and half asleep, I flopped my giant pregnant self over (which is getting to be a production) and ...fell off the bed.

NO, I wasn't hurt at all, but I was a little "surprised" to say it nicely. On a brighter note, it woke the hubby up so I was able to get back into bed and asleep before he started snoring again.